Log in

No account? Create an account


About Recent Entries

Feb. 3rd, 2011 @ 06:49 pm
I cant even come up with a subject for this. I am so hurt, and angry. For the past year and a half i have been on a complete emotional roller coaster when it comes to my brother and my beautiful nieces and nephew. first the false allegations of abuse, then the restraining order. the chance encounter seeing Dom and the kids at Mcdonalds, and getting permission to see them from time to time. Hearing Taylor call the scum bag that is living there daddy..
Now my lazy selfish asshole of a brother is considering give up his paternal rights. he whines and says there is nothing i can do, this state hates men... blah blah blah. I took ten minutes and found over 20 sites that help low income fathers get and protect there rights. he always has a million excuses not to do something about it, but has no issue buying new cars, going to strip clubs, getting tattoos and driving across the state to hook up with little sluts.
As the aunt, I have no legal rights, if he does this, i lose them completely. If he does this, I no longer will have any contact with him or my mom. I am done with the games, the guilt and the pain. I love those babies so much. And if he and my mom are willing to just let them go because he wont get off his ass and actually fight for them, I dont want anything to do with them.
I feel so overwhelmed and devastated. I cant emotionally handle this roller coaster anymore
Mood: depresseddepressed

Wanna Be Friends? May. 6th, 2005 @ 05:23 pm
For those of you who are already my friends, you do not need to comment.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Mood: flirtyflirty
Tunes: Everyday is Halloween

Frustrated!! Feb. 8th, 2005 @ 03:10 pm
every month i seem to have more and more problems with my damn payee.. he was suppose to mail my rent check last tuesday to ensure it would not be late.. he didnt mail it till friday as well as sending me my money for expeses.. the office has yet to recieve the check nor have i gotten one. i dont have a fuckin penny to my name and my rent is fuckin late, my very first month here. i dont know whats up. is it the mail system, did it go to the wrong address or what? im so frustrated i want to scream!
Mood: frustratedfrustrated
Tunes: Tainted Love / Marilyn Manson

things that make you go Hmmmmmmmmm.. Feb. 6th, 2005 @ 08:44 pm
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
Barbara Streisand sings for you.

You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.

You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.

You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

You have two cows.
Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.

You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
Your stock goes up.

You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.

You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
You break for lunch.
Life is good.

You have two cows.
You have some vodka.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You have some more vodka.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.

You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private parts.
You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons.

You have two cows.
They go into hiding.
They send radio tapes of their mooing.

You have two bulls.
Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.

You have one cow.
The cow is schizophrenic.
Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish.
The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow.
The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk.
The cow asks permission to be cut in half.
The cow dies happy.

You have a black cow and a brown cow.
Everyone votes for the best looking one.
Some of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally vote for the black one.
Some people vote for both.
Some people vote for neither.
Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.
Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you think is the best-looking cow.

You have millions of cows.
They make real California cheese.
Only five speak English.
Most are illegal.
Arnold likes the ones with the big udders.
Mood: boredbored
Tunes: watchig CSI

rough night Feb. 2nd, 2005 @ 12:25 am
tonight is a hard night. i cant get my baby off my mind. i want so much to hold him, hear his little meow, hold his tail as i fall asleep. i want my baby.. oh matisse i miss you so much..
Mood: melancholymelancholy
Tunes: mash
Other entries
» (No Subject)

"Boulevard Of Broken Dreams"

I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
and I'm the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah,
Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line
Of the edge and where I walk alone

Read between the lines
What's fucked up and everything's alright
Check my vital signs
To know I'm still alive and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah
Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I walk alone
I walk a...

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone...
» funny
Q. What can a lifesaver do for a woman a man can't?
A. Cum in five different flavours.
» new start
well, i finally got settled into my new place. i love it. its small but doesnt feel so, big windows and high high cellings.. im happy with it.
still very sad about matisse. the pain never really goes away. i miss him so much and its so hard not having Sabrina here yet. i dont have the money for the deposit yet. im so broke. i had to pay for the vet last month and got an advance from febs check. then i had to pay a deposit to move in here and then rent so im left with 30 dollars for the month of feb. oh well .. march will be better. then i can start to pay some people back who helped me out, and take care of some buisness with an old roommate.
pulled my jewelry from the store down here. they have way too many jewelry pieces there and nothing was selling. been almost a year and sold less then 10 dollars. the store isnt doing very well at all.. i hope they dont close.
my brothers daughter was born. a beautiful girl. Jordan Marie. 8lbs 15 oz 21 inches. jan 26th 821 pm. Dom, had to have a c section cause jordans head was so big, she was stuck in the pelvic region and dom had been in hard labor for a long time. i havent met her yet.. WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH but i was sick. and there was no way i was gonna expose my new born niece to the flu.. hope to see her this weekend. not much else to say. if you want my mailing address.. send me a message and ill email it to you. no phone yet. soon i hope.
miss all my friends out there. been wierd being out of touch.
» update
i dont have internet yet. so i get on when ever i can
i have a potential apartment. going to finish some paperwork in a few minutes. sad news, i had to put matisse to sleep on saturday. my heart is broken and my depression has become severe. im one step into the hospital. he was very sick. lost over 7lbs in less then a week. with is too much if you only weighed 15lbs to begin wiht. he wasnt eating or drinking. they couldnt figure out what was wrong with him, test after test. i was feeding him with a syringe filled with babyfood,and water. giving him one med after another. my beautiful baby was diying. he had something called FIP, which normaly doesnt affect cats this bad, though they have discovered that some are geneticly dissposed to it. and he was. it was also contagious. and im living with 4 other cats. including sabrina. who is ok. none of the other cats show any sings of being sick. thank the goddess. i miss my baby. and there isnt a day i dont cry for him. i love him so. couldnt have loved him more if he was human.
» Holliday wishes
Just wanted to wish you all a merry christmas. i dont have internet yet so im online only at friends houses. for now.. but i am wishing you all love and hope you are with the ones you love.
Top of Page Powered by LiveJournal.com